sometimes i feel this is more than a heaven, yet sometimes i feel this is hell.
how could you stay in hell for a long time?
i am not talking about heaven and hell after death of course.
i mean, we all deserve of truly hell, aye?
but, i don't get it. really don't get it. why people always showing up their ego?
yes we are just human and ain't an angel, but could you understand how to put your ego to people? like don't make them mad when they are fasting and you are not?
this is could be the reason why sometimes i don't want to go to this place. i want to stay much longer in my place and do something fun without tears in every week. every week.
yes, always someone else's fault. my fault for sure.
always me. me. ME.
when i say something in my head, you said if that isn't appropriate to say to others. but you can freely say what you want. judge what you see without hear people reason.
i don't mad at all. i just feel this is why i don't feel fit in this 'life' anymore. i feel like i want to hide into a dark forest and no one can find me. no one.
i miss how my college life get me to keep busy all the time and i miss the moment when i could be 'me' without pretending to be someone else.
yet, thank you for the love that you gave for me at the first time we met. yes, when i was born.
and, all i want just you to understand me. you to stop judging me without hear the reason. you to know how hard the life i live now.
thank you, angel. :-)
